Dancing with Elephants: Mindfulness Training For Those Living With Dementia, Chronic Illness or an Aging Brain (How to Die Smiling)
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Want to enjoy the life you are living, even as you face major life challenges?

Is your mind succumbing to age? Is your body failing you? Can you ever find joy, peace, or fulfillment in these challenging conditions? The answer is a resounding YES.

Author Jarem Sawatsky saw the countless guides out there for those caring for the ill and healing the curable, but when he was diagnosed with Huntington’s Disease he found there was nothing for those living with an incurable illness. He quit his job as a professor and devoted his life to exploring the possibilities of living with chronic conditions. Now he’s bringing his findings and insights to you in this empowering mindfulness guide.

In Dancing With Elephants you’ll discover:

  • Simple practices to bring healing to your heart and life to your new outlook
  • Humorous (and occasionally heart-wrenching) stories of Sawatsky’s own journey of self-discovery and surprising family caregiving
  • Multiple ways to build confidence in yourself, even when you’ve been shaken to the core
  • A new perspective to transform your pain and renew your spirit
  • Practical tools to face your seemingly inescapable fears, and much, much more!

Based on the popular blog of the same name, Dancing With Elephants includes insightful interviews with compassion experts Jon Kabat-Zinn, Lucy Kalanithi, and Patch Adams. Sawatsky’s landmark book provides support that only a fellow traveler down this road can offer.

If you like touching stories, mindful wisdom, and a touch of irreverent humor, then you’ll love Sawatsky’s life-changing book.

17 reviews for Dancing with Elephants: Mindfulness Training For Those Living With Dementia, Chronic Illness or an Aging Brain (How to Die Smiling)

  1. Herbert A. Wade
    March 31, 2022
    5.0 out of 5 stars A wonderful book that has helped me so very much
    It is so difficult to be in poor health with increasing loss of mental facilities and physical strength. Yet Jarem Swatasky has shown a way to live we...More
    It is so difficult to be in poor health with increasing loss of mental facilities and physical strength. Yet Jarem Swatasky has shown a way to live well day to day and not fear or fight what is in the future and ruin today due to fear of tomorrow. I read the book through in one sitting, something I rarely do, and plan to read it again soon. Thank you Jarem and continue the dance..
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    Miller
    January 2, 2021
    5.0 out of 5 stars An Interesting and thoughtful view of life
    This book by Dr. Jarem Sawatsky, Dancing With Elephants, is well written and gives the reader thought provoking issues to consider...The book is wri...More
    This book by Dr. Jarem Sawatsky, Dancing With Elephants, is well written and gives the reader thought provoking issues to consider...The book is written primarily for persons with a chronic and progressive disease...Sawatsky has been disagnosed with Huntington's disease, an incurable brain disease ....This book is his training manual which he has developed over the years to cope with a terminal disease..He divides the book into five sections...Life, Happiness, Love, Speech & LIstening, Nourishment & Healing.. Much of the book gives his personal experience with the disease, but he also includes interviews with experts and people who successfully have dealt with disease..e.g. Patch Adams,MD.... I found this book gave me new ideas and coping techniques, and it could be useful for anyone trying to find a purpose in life with or without chronic illness...
    Helpful? 0 0
    Diane Jackman
    September 5, 2020
    5.0 out of 5 stars Filled with good suggestions!
    I bought this book because my mother is watching my father disappear before her eyes after 65 years of loving and living in wedded bliss. I felt as th...More
    I bought this book because my mother is watching my father disappear before her eyes after 65 years of loving and living in wedded bliss. I felt as though there was nothing I could do until I read this author's journey. He tells us of simple ways he deals with the pain of his own chronic illness. I went through this easy to read book, made notes and highlighted phrases for my mother to read. The very next day she called to tell me she had read through all the highlighted portions and felt the book contained some very good suggestions. Things have been easier for her and helping my parents' on their end of life journeys makes this book worth every penny spent and more!
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    Sandy v.
    July 6, 2018
    5.0 out of 5 stars We are more than our disease....
    The wonderful title caught my eye, and I bought it to learn how the author could be upbeat while living with Huntington’s Disease. I am so glad I now ...More
    The wonderful title caught my eye, and I bought it to learn how the author could be upbeat while living with Huntington’s Disease. I am so glad I now have this insightful and joyful book. I have been trying to find a way to maintain a semblance of joy as I live with Parkinson’s disease, and I find myself rereading parts of it on my more challenging days and always find a needed bit of inspiration and a smile. At a minimum the book reminds me to meditate, which is the best advice to dance well with our elephants. Jarem writes with such honesty and such humor... it’s amazing. His courage in sharing his dance with his elephant is remarkable. The video interviews with Jon Kabat-Zinn, Patch Adams and others are a wonderful gift he sends you which offer helpful worth the price themselves.
    Helpful? 0 0
    DTH/SOS
    June 26, 2018
    5.0 out of 5 stars Offers Hope and Strength....and Joy
    A lovely and powerful reminder that living a joy-filled life depends less on our circumstances and more on the people we invite to share our journeys....More
    A lovely and powerful reminder that living a joy-filled life depends less on our circumstances and more on the people we invite to share our journeys. While the subtitle says: "Mindfulness Training for Those Living with Dementia, Chronic Illness or an Aging Brain", the book really offers hope to us all that life can be filled with peace, love and laughter in even the most painful and unexpected circumstances. I am touched that the author has invited his readers to be fellow travelers by offering us options to keep in touch with him: his blog, access to video conversations with people he writes about in his book, etc. I am inspired by the content of this book, and the spirit in which it is written.
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    fedupwithcrap
    June 6, 2018
    5.0 out of 5 stars Rebalances The Soul After Lifetime Exposure To Entitlement Marketing.
    I don't have Huntington's Disease but was curious about the mindset of a person facing terminal illness and daily loss. For me this read as a meditat...More
    I don't have Huntington's Disease but was curious about the mindset of a person facing terminal illness and daily loss. For me this read as a meditation on the benefits of circling back over and over to gratitude throughout the day as the attitude for the day in order to incorporate gratitude as the default mindset versus what I have been methodically trained to gravitate towards through lifelong exposure to entitlement marketing.
    My heart goes out to this family as it does to all families facing terminal illness- been there ourselves. More time for people and less time for stuff seems to balance the soul- we instinctively know what is better but like addicts, we return to the half full pit, time and time again only to be healed again and again by connection to others and realizing how much those connections are the foundation of a humane humanity.
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    Goldop
    May 26, 2018
    5.0 out of 5 stars Shh. Don't tell anyone. I think this book was written just for me.
    Shortly after I stated reading “Dancing With Elephants,” I fell in love with Jarem Sawatsky’s writer’s voice; so much so that at that moment of inspir...More
    Shortly after I stated reading “Dancing With Elephants,” I fell in love with Jarem Sawatsky’s writer’s voice; so much so that at that moment of inspiration I turned to the back page to see the page number “222,” and immediately thought, this wonderful journey is going to go way too fast. So I went back to where I had left off and resumed reading. This time I read mindfully and compassionately slow. There were places where my eyes filled with tears of comfort and joy because I felt this book had been written for me. Someone understands how I feel.
    See, my wife, about 3 years ago, developed vascular dementia. She’s holding up pretty good, better than I, somedays—most days, really; though she does have her gloomy and angry moments.
    There are times she yells so loud and is so nasty sounding (by all appearances it seems she is yelling at me) that the elephants stop dancing and just stare at her and me.
    On one such occasion, in a grocery store, after my wife yelled really loud and then walked away from me, a young man walked up to me. Holding up his fist, he said, “I would never let my wife talk to me that way,” while never making eye contact with me. He was wearing a MAGA t-shirt, and I could only feel sorrow for him. I honestly had no anger in me and felt no need to explain my situation to him. Then he strutted away from me while shaking his head. What he didn’t know was that all the employees at the grocery store knew about my wife’s health situation (she had yelled out in their store before.) And they gave me reassuring smiles and shrugs and thumbs up.
    Had that incident occurred a year or so ago, I would have felt the need to explain everything to this sorrowful stranger and maybe do him some harm, which would have made me more like this sorrowful fellow.
    This “Dancing With Elephants” is a journey I highly recommend, even for the healthy among us.
    Who knows, it could be written for you.
    Helpful? 0 0
    K.Milby
    May 21, 2018
    5.0 out of 5 stars Best book I have read in a long time dealing with chronic illness.
    I love this book. I bought it originally because my mom (and now dad) has dementia. However, while reading it realized that this book has a lot to te...More
    I love this book. I bought it originally because my mom (and now dad) has dementia. However, while reading it realized that this book has a lot to teach me on how to deal with my autoimmune disease. Jarem has a devastating disease - he talks about the real life struggles he and his family are dealing with. He also talks about some of his friends that are also dealing with chronic diseases or have died from them. He also gives us links to blogs and support groups for those of us dealing with chronic disease which I intend to join soon. I learned a lot from Jarem and am re-reading the book again because there is so much wisdom that I need to internalize in my life. Dealing with 2 loved ones who are very sick with dementia and one with cancer plus my own health is very difficult and leaves me feeling helpless and not very hopeful. Somehow I feel a little better while reading this book. It was also easier for me to stay calm and loving when visiting my parents recently. I highly recommend this book for anyone who is ill or caretaking.
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    Kindle Customer
    March 4, 2018
    5.0 out of 5 stars ... those terminally ill how to live their life in love with everything they already have instead of what they ...
    The purpose of this book is to teach those terminally ill how to live their life in love with everything they already have instead of what they don't ...More
    The purpose of this book is to teach those terminally ill how to live their life in love with everything they already have instead of what they don't have or what is happening to them because of their disease. But it is also a good book for those who want advice on how to live a happier life, even if you aren't facing death. As he states in the book, "I don't mean to alarm you, but all of us are in the same boat, as life is a fatal condition." I think the values taught in this book are beautiful and if taught to children, we would have much happier adults in the next generation who know how to deal with feelings and how to properly love their fellow humans. His chapter including Lucy Kalanithi is absolutely incredible and has changed the way I view terminal illnesses, love, and life altogether. I have read 'When Breath Becomes Air' before but it didn't hit home the way it did in this book. The only thing I didn't like about the book is he gets political for part of chapter 17 when he confesses that he supports hiring individuals based on their sex instead of on merit and that he blames white males for all of the problems in every aspect of society. However, since the rest of the book was so good I couldn't take a star off just because I disagree with him politically and I didn't buy the book for political reasons (even though it would be nice to have some outlet that is free of it).
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    Connie Wallace
    February 4, 2018
    5.0 out of 5 stars This is a very amazing book to read
    This is a very amazing book to read. It made me look at things in a different light! I started thinking about my "elephants" and how I could/should ...More
    This is a very amazing book to read. It made me look at things in a different light! I started thinking about my "elephants" and how I could/should face them! I do have many elephants! I like that he calls them elephants! It makes it sound, although it's may be big, it is possible to find a way to dance with it, rather that get mad at it! I really recommend this to the elderly (of which I am). You can gripe, cuss, rant and rave and make you and everyone else around you upset.... OR you can just dance with it! There are things in life that we can't change no matter what we do.....so just "dance"!!!! .
    Helpful? 0 0
    Priscilla
    January 10, 2018
    5.0 out of 5 stars EVERYONE should read this. It is definitely a book that should be on your bucket list!
    I am in the middle of this wonderful book. I have always feared death as I have watched too many of my friends dying young. Losing a bother at 26 and ...More
    I am in the middle of this wonderful book. I have always feared death as I have watched too many of my friends dying young. Losing a bother at 26 and a Dad at 45, I faced my own mortality as a teenager. So many questions and wanting to learn to accept that I will die one day. This book is such an upbeat, joyful, positive way of facing death as we linger through it. What a strong person to be able to share this at a time he was travelling the road to his next life's dimension. It is truly helping me to understand HOW to accept death, how to view it differently than how Americans do. It is very settling and teaching me a whole different way of viewing death as a positive part of our life. Thank you for these awesome insights that he has been able to capture and put down into this marvelous book ( even as he was passing through this himself). Anyone who has been given a terminal notice should read this book of soothing tranquility. So very warm and encouraging for others who are caretakers of those they love who are on their way to another continuum of their life. A book for the living, even while dying.
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    Mary Katherine Fulk
    January 7, 2018
    5.0 out of 5 stars A must read for all who want their life to have meaning.
    I bought this book for my Dad, who has some dementia. Being very protective of him I wanted to read this book before sharing it with him. Kinda funny,...More
    I bought this book for my Dad, who has some dementia. Being very protective of him I wanted to read this book before sharing it with him. Kinda funny, since he is 89 years old and full of wisdom. This book has probably had more of an impact on me than it will have on him but only time will tell as I will give it to him tomorrow. Anyone who is a caregiver needs to read this book. Anyone who wants to age gracefully and continue to contribute to the world as they move towards death (we are all headed in that direction, right?) needs to read this book. This book has shown me that I am continuing to work instead of retiring in part because of the fear of that label "retirement" and what that means to me as I define my life and it's purpose. Thank you Jarem for writing Dancing With Elephants. I will post a follow up after my Dad reads it.
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    Jody
    November 29, 2017
    5.0 out of 5 stars What a gem!
    Thank you Jarem for this exceptional gift of a book! There are many excellent reviews already, which I will just heartily second. Don't let the low pr...More
    Thank you Jarem for this exceptional gift of a book! There are many excellent reviews already, which I will just heartily second. Don't let the low price throw you, this book is beautifully written, jam packed and life changing, even if you are in excellent health. I read through it quickly because it just drew me in and now I am going back to slowly savor the wisdom in each chapter. If you are a fan of Thich Nhat Hahn you'll love it. Please don't hesitate to click that order button for yourself or for anyone you know. You'll be glad you did and the world will be a better place if only a few of the ideas in this book are put into practice.
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    Wander Woman
    October 9, 2017
    5.0 out of 5 stars How One Can Live *Well* During Years of Declining or Uncertain Health
    It's rare to find books on the day-to-day practicalities of maintaining even a stable outlook whilst one's health is considered, by the powers that be...More
    It's rare to find books on the day-to-day practicalities of maintaining even a stable outlook whilst one's health is considered, by the powers that be, a disability. It's even more difficult to find a book that discusses how to live well in the midst of uncertain or declining health. The structure of the book works well, with each major section and many individual chapters focusing on a specific practice or action that has also worked for Sawatsky and other writers who cover the same specific topic, although often in a tangential manner. With 15 years of multiple chronic illnesses that I have stumbled through, often alone, I only wish this book had been written and available then.
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    David H
    August 2, 2017
    5.0 out of 5 stars OUTSTANDING BOOK!
    This book is a GREAT read. I started reading it in early 2017. I started this review shortly after finishing the book the first time - shortly after i...More
    This book is a GREAT read. I started reading it in early 2017. I started this review shortly after finishing the book the first time - shortly after it was published. And now, finally, thought it was time to get this review ‘out there’.

    I am currently in the beginning stages of a medical workup for ‘dementia’. I don’t know yet where this will lead. In view of this, the book takes on a special significance for me. My oldest sister died with, not of, moderately advanced Alzheimer’s disease at an advanced age of 89.

    The book captivated me from the very beginning. It is written with all the earmarks of authenticity. The author is clearly one who has ‘walked the walk’ to write about what he writes about. The book is particularly helpful to people who want to know about the problems of aging, debilitating diseases, (and there are others besides HD!) losing one’s mind, or even may have HD, Huntington’s Disease. Or people who are experiencing these same issues. I especially was interested by the video reviews of interviews with various people who had influenced Jarem. Very powerful interviews.

    Jarem writes ‘from the heart’. So, it is easy to read him, but much of the subject matter is common knowledge to him, since he has been learning/teaching related stuff for decades. He uses phrases like everyone should know about what he is writing. Here I refer to words/phrases like mindfulness, mindful falling, (how can there be such a thing as "mindful falling?"), mindfulness training, deep listening, restorative justice, healing justice, and others. It seems that most people he interviews are familiar with these words or phrases as well. I guess I have not had pre-knowledge of these phrases. I have some learning to do. But it has been worth it. In spite of these criticisms, I give him 5 stars.

    I have no hesitation recommending this book. Read it and enjoy. I am well into the book for the SECOND time – ALREADY!

    David Hoeppner
    August 2, 2017
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    Rose Anchorage
    March 13, 2017
    5.0 out of 5 stars Loving, Letting Go, and Living in the Present Moment
    Bought both hardback and digital copy of Dancing with Elephants, by Jarem Sawatsky, PhD; With my dementia symptoms, reading requires extra time and ex...More
    Bought both hardback and digital copy of Dancing with Elephants, by Jarem Sawatsky, PhD; With my dementia symptoms, reading requires extra time and extra tools, so I have only completed the first six chapters. So far, this book is not just profound in an esoteric way, but with important applications to the life of each Person With Dementia (and those who care about them). “Honey, you go on to bed; this book is just so profound that I need to keep reading.”” Yup; when reading this book that was what I told my husband.

    This is a book for facing disease and aging in a ‘healing’ way; the clarity to help each of us learn about loving, letting go, and living in the present moment. If I were able, I would read it like a quality textbook; quick scan, then very slow thoughtful digestion of each chapter. Filled with jewels of thought, Jarem’s words reflect many of my friend’s thoughts on what are the most crucial actions and attitudes for best well-being after diagnosis … with excellent suggestions for follow-up.

    Congratulations on this book, Jarem!
    Truthful L. Kindness
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    Lana Phillips
    March 6, 2017
    5.0 out of 5 stars You Won't Forget This Any Time Soon!
    I read an advance reader copy, and I've been trying to figure out what to say about it since.The amount of wisdom contained in this book is unbelievab...More
    I read an advance reader copy, and I've been trying to figure out what to say about it since.

    The amount of wisdom contained in this book is unbelievable. Jarem interviewed Jon Kabat-Zinn, Patch Adams, Lucy Kalanthi (wife of Paul Kalanthi who wrote When Breath Becomes Air), Jean Paul Lederach, and Toni Bernhard about living with chronic illness. He comes from a Christian background, but is heavily influenced by the teachings of Thich Nhat Hanh. It's a unique spirituality that makes this book just that much more special.

    His story of living with Huntington's Disease as a family member (it is genetic) and after he received the diagnosis he had expected to get is not sad or sentimental in any way. You don't feel sorry for him in any way when reading this narrative. He "transformed fear into joyful dancing."

    The cover is one of the most fun I've ever seen. I would never have considered dancing with elephants as a way of going through, but Jarem not only makes it seem bearable, but a love-filled joy.

    If you need some encouragement in living with joy, read this book. It will change your perspective on everything. Even if you don't have a chronic illness, I recommend this book. It's one that will stay with you and teach you something new with every page.

    I love his poetry as well. It enhanced the prose in a way that blessed me.
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